Ahhhhh the holidays! A time to gather family and friends from far and near. A time to relax and reflect on the blessing and bounty we enjoy. A time to eat a bit more than we normally do with the resolve to take off those extra pounds after January 1. Nothing is more blissful than the holiday season. There is no better way to end the year than the warmth and joy the holiday season brings...
Sound familiar?
Not even close for me!!! And I am sure not even close for many of you! While we enjoy the holiday season, many of us look forward to the extra work, extra expense, and extra stress with maybe a bit of fear? loathing? resentment? hostility?
Ladies, the holidays are here to stay. Nothing we can do about it. BUT...(isn't there always a big but?) there are a few things we can do to mitigate some of the stress we experience during these last two months of the year. Here are a few for you! If you have other suggestions, please feel free to post comments and share how you deal with and manage holiday stress!
Happy Holidays to ALL! And to all a stress-free night!
Reminisce over previous holidays. In your notebook create a column for What Works and another for Not That Again. Under What Works list the activities that bring you joy, those that come naturally to you, and those that seem to click into place. Under Not That Again list your challenges. Jot the things that drain your energy and bring you down. What can you do to delegate, dump, or change those items in the Not That Again column and embrace more of the things in the What Works column? What changes need to take place? (Who really is going to make these lists and check them twice? Not me! But I like the idea of making mental lists that resemble the above. Martha Stewart can make these lists and glue pine cones and cinnamon sticks to them...she's got the time...and a staff of 400.)
Set your top 3 priorities. Get crystal clear. Write them down. When you know your priorities you are able to respond easily to a request. When you know what is important to you it becomes easier to set boundaries. When someone asks you to get involved in a project or activity request 24 hours to respond. Look at your top 3 priorities and see if it serves them. If it does, then it is worth considering. If not, the answer is likely no. (Love this! Especially the part about requesting 24 hours to respond! I can use this ALL YEAR LONG!!!)
Simplify! Every task must be handled. Your options are to do it, delegate it, or dump it. Eliminate what does not serve your top 3 priorities. What can you get help on and delegate? This is a good time to get rid of those items on your Not That Again list. Hire someone to decorate or a housekeeper for the month. Have everyone bring a dish instead of you doing it all yourself. Get your family involved and develop a new attitude that things don't have to be perfect. Let go. This will allow you space to embrace what you enjoy. (Triple D! A motto to live by! DO IT, DELEGATE IT, or DUMP IT.)
Set your budget. Develop a budget that feels good. Many people are tight on cash. There are lots of ways to make this holiday special without adding stress to your budget. How can you show people they are appreciated? What activities can you do as a family? Letting people know what is special about them in a card, letter, audio cassette, or video is a great gift. Get creative and have fun. (How about a "naughty" and "nice" list? Santa isn't the only one who can use this method!)
Set your boundaries. Decide now what you will not tolerate. Write it down. Remember your Not That Again list? Is there someone who always ropes you into things you do not want to do? Have the conversation you need to have. No is no. If someone continues to ask after you said no, they are attempting to control you. Setting boundaries is about educating people on how they can treat you. Is there someone you need to educate?
Schedule one hour a week for planning and schedule time for yourself. When is a good time for you to update your task list? When can you take time for you? Put it on your calendar every week through the end of the year and keep those appointments. See if adding this line to your planner will help you keep your appointment: "I have an appointment in honor of myself this ______(day) at __:__ (time) to do something really special for me because I sooooooo deserve it!" (I say as your purchase your 2009 calendars, that you schedule yourself in to your schedule every week!)
Give in a way that gives you joy vs. out of obligation. When you give in a way that comes naturally to you, you stay in integrity with who you are. Therefore, you are able to share your own special gifts with others. When you are doing what you love life seems to click. If there is a situation you are dreading, think about how you can tweak it and handle it in a way that would bring you joy. (Obligation is such a dirty word. Are we really obligated to do most of the things we find ourselves doing? Think about it...)
We're all in this together, troops! Now let's get out there and ENJOY the holidays!
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